Our panel of 91 professional philosophers has responded to

81
 questions about 
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117
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1280
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54
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4
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392
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58
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244
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218
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75
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70
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75
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32
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287
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110
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124
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43
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208
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88
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51
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24
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77
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282
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154
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36
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31
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221
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151
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58
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89
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23
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374
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39
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170
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67
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96
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80
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5
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68
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284
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134
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110
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34
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69
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574
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Philosophy
105
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Question of the Day

If I really believed that you really believed that these are the only two alternatives, then I'd probably believe that you're stupid. But I don't believe any such thing. I'd be willing to bet a tidy sum that if someone else asked you the very same question, you wouldn't have any trouble pointing out a whole bunch of alternatives that they're overlooking.

Since I don't know anything about your circumstances, I wouldn't presume to guess which alternative best fits your circumstances. But I do think the idea that there's a "real place" for each of us is something to be suspicious of, and I'm also pretty skeptical that even self-aware people are always reliable about what they're capable of.

Of course, if you've already grasped the second horn of your dilemma (false dilemma though it is), my reaction won't count. In spite of this, I'd suggest that one kind of reaction it's often wise to ignore is the one that tries to shame you into not trying things. The approval of people who react like that isn't worth having anyway.