Is there a difference between the words and expressions a person uses to say what he/she believes, and the beliefs themselves? Is one more important than the other?

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Certainly, there is a difference between saying "Harry is rude" and believing that Harry is rude since we can say things that we don't believe and we can believe things that we don't say. But I think your (first) question is about how closely the content of our words matches the content of our beliefs in cases where we do our best to say what we believe. Here are a few cases where the content of my sincere words and the content of my beliefs may diverge:

1. I may say "Harry is rude" without really understanding the difference between being rude and being obnoxious, in which case the content of what I say may be somewhat different than the content of my belief -- if what I really believe, without having the right word to express it, is that he is obnoxious. Once someone explains the difference to me, I would recognize that I believe Harry is obnoxious rather than rude.

2. I may say "Harry is rude", knowing that this is a rather simplified expression of my belief yet being unwilling to take the time to add various qualifications -- that he is only occasionally rude, or only rude to people that annoy him, for example. If someone else voices these qualifications, I easily agree without altering my belief in any way.

3. A child may ask me whether Harry is rude and I may say "Yes, Harry is rude" because I know that this is best word for marking a point of agreement between me and the child. If I said "No, Harry is not rude, he is obnoxious", the child would wrongly assume that I do not agree with her. I am trying my best to share my belief with my audience.

These cases should also make it clear that there is no general answer to your (second) question about whether the contents of our words or the contents of our beliefs are more important (when they diverge). Both matter but they matter in different ways. The content of our words matters the most when there are not other indicators of what we believe, or when our audience is inattentive to those indicators. Words matter least when our audience can be counted on to share most of our assumptions, or when the focus is on immediate action rather than psychological discernment.

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